clearing my mind, from the perspective of a skeptic

the human existence equals less than nothing.

we are just a spec.

a stray dog on the universe's city streets. Something making a way for itself, but ending up with nothing to call its own. traversing through time only to be overlooked and forgotten.

i say i love you. you who is my friend. you who is my brother. you is my sister. you who is my mother. you who is my father. you is my soul mate. you is my dirty secret. you who is my dog. you who is my wife. you who is my savior. you who is my enemy.

when we laugh together, i want you to know i love you. but its hard for us to admit it.

because we as a species dont know what love really is. we can't.

our brains are too small to fully comprehend it. maybe it's better that way.

if i knew how much i actually loved other people, i might explode.

so perhaps it remains to my advantage to live dancing the stray dog strutt. on a journey, completely oblivious.

when we smile at each other, we feel warm. maybe just a small spark of what true love really is. the love of a friend who would take a bullet for you.

but since we are ever-changing beings, we can't ever love another person. nor can we hate them. because once we commit an emotional association to someone, they have changed. and we are left loving or hating nothing more than an idea, a memory.

we can say that we have loved... but we can never love presently.

we'll all end up laughing in the face of love someday. because nobody's really there. nobody's real.

nobody.

we do not remain. we are fragile.

i knew you once. i called you my equal. i called you my brother. i called you my guilty pleasure. i called you my companion. i called you my friend.

but i am not your friend. i never have been.

I love you.